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Before BFDI/Week 2
This is the second week in the Before BFDI series. Part 1 is this page over here! Plot Synopsis Here you go! Characters Here you go once again! The week … 'Sunday, December 9' '1. The Triángolo's house' Scene: Pencil is watching a news report about the crash landing. *'Teleprompter': [holding a microphone whilst standing in ice] This just in, an Unidentified Flying Object has fell and landed in the middle of Greenland; nobody knows what could have happened to it when it ice landed in the crash, w— *'Man': It's "crash landed in the ice". *'Teleprompter': I'm sorry, I've only anchored for the last 56 years! Anyways, to continue, it landed in the ice and all that was left is some scrap metal. How useless! *'P'e'nci'l: This show is, like, terrible. An' besides! I 'ave to go! [Exit Pencil.] '2. In the car' Scene: The family is driving home after church. Needle and Nelson are strangely ecstatic, whilst Pencil and Estigua scoff at an idea like that. *'Nelson': Wow! ChurchThey're Catholic. was fun! *'Needle': It was! I mean, I've never said anything like this before! *'P'e'nci'l: I thinks it was the bread. It tasted kinde' diff'ren'. *'Estigua': É esse novo químico."It's that new chemical." (Pt.) *'P'e'nci'l: Aye, I remember'e! The rares' chemical in the world! "See h'if 'e die?" "Tea h'off bee sky?" Wote'er, I really don' need ter remember'ee. Jus'ee't'was in Match's 'air.She's stumbling over the fact that it's BfDI! *'Nelson': Can we turn on the music? It's too quiet! I think I want to … to— *'Needle': Oh no … *'Nelson': Mpbleeeekhhhhhhhhhhh! [vomits in the car] *'Estigua': Não é o carro!"No, not the car!" (Pt.) *'P'e'nci'l: Y'know, Nels, if you wan' to vomit jus' open yer window an' do h'it out there. *'Needle': Why, that's disgusting! *'P'e'nci'l: [sighs] Mum, turn on the radio now! *'Estigua': Bem."Fine." (Pt.) [turns on the radio] *'J'u'k'e'b'o'x': [on the radio] And that's why you should never call an elephant a cow. Next on obscure trivia is science. *'Nelson': Ooh, I love science! *'J'u'k'e'b'o'x': A thing that many people are not aware of is that there is a new chemical combination. Scientists at the Pediatricians' Apothecary of Nairobii.e. Where Estigua and Test Tube were when you last saw them together. discovered Benjaminfranklinium deuterium iodide, better known as BfDI. [Estigua swerves in shock.] *'All': Ah! *'P'e'nci'l: Mum, watch out! *'Estigua': Sinto muito. Mas agora eu tenho que … que"I'm sorry. But now I have to … to—" (Pt.) [vomits in the car] Bleeeeeekhhhhhhhhhhhh! *'Needle': Oh great, that's two! *'P'e'nci'l: Wot's worse is that BFDI is now known outside of school. *'Needle': By four people. How many people listen to these facts anyway? *'P'e'nci'l: This is one o' the most well-known radio stations in all o' Kenya. *'Needle': Noooooooooooooooooooooooo! *'P'e'nci'l: 'Ey, relax, Needy! *'Needle': [slaps] Don't call me Needy! But no. '3. The house' Scene: Pencil is reclining on the couch anxiously with a telephone calling people. *'P'e'nci'l: You heard it too Book? Ok, bye. [hangs up and calls Bubble] Omg, Bubble, did'ee hear about … that's wot I was callin'ee 'bout. [Enter Estigua.] *'P'e'nci'l: 'Ey, mum. *'Estigua': Penél'ta, acho que precisamos conversar."Penc, I think we need to talk." (Pt.) *'P'e'nci'l: Oh no! Is this like one o' they converzations where I'm ol' enough to talk 'bout me? Or thet converzation when'ee finds out I have a B+Don't be fooled: what is 87-89 in America is 70-74 in Kenya. in me Kenya 'istory? *'Estigua': Tens um C na história queniana?"You have a C in Kenyan history?" (Pt.) *'P'e'nci'l: Sorry, that ain't suppos' to come out. *'Estigua': É por isso que vim aqui. Sua escola é realizar uma feira universidade."That is why I came here. Your school is having a college fair." (Pt.) *'P'e'nci'l: But it's also fer clubs! *'Estigua': Haverá professores lá, então você deve estar no seu melhor compo—"There'll be teachers there, so you have to be on your best beha—" (Pt.) [noticing she's gone] Penélope? 'Monday, December 10' '1. The house' Scene: Night. Everyone is sleeping, when suddenly … *'P'e'nci'l: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! [Needle and Nelson wake up] *'Needle': What's wrong? *'P'e'nci'l: My eraser, it 'urts! *'Needle': Did you take anything? *'P'e'nci'l: No! *'Needle': Well, I think it was the— [has pain] Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! [Enter Estigua.] *'Estigua': Têm dor também?"Do you all have pain also?" (Pt.) *'Nelson': Yes! *'Estigua': Saiam da cama. Vamos para farmácia agora."Get out of bed. We're going to the pharmacy now." (Pt.) [Omnes exeunt.] '2. TT's Pharmacy' Scene: The Triángolos try to find parking at the centre, but all the spaces are full. *'Needle': Is everyone here? *'P'e'nci'l: Prob'ly. [They exit the car into the door. Test Tube is greeting everyone as the crowd rushes in.] *'Test Tube': Come one, come all to TT's Pharmacy, where you c— [nearly is trampled by everyone. She jumps behind the counter] —''AN BUY YOUR ANTI-BFDI ITCH CREAMS! I SPEAK ENGLISH, PORTUGUESE AND SCIENCE!'' *'Canadian Dollar'Who also happens to be TT's Pharmaceutical Security.: Everyone in the crowd, lower your voices to a whisper please! [Everyone rushes into line. Estigua is in the middle of the line. Pencil, Needle and Nelson slip into the crowd when they see their friends.] '3. The alliance's portion of the line' Scene: The alliance, though sandwiched between many people, are talking to each other. *'P'e'nci'l: [to the alliance] Omg, h'everyone, 'ow'd'ee get all together like thet? *'Bo'ok: We all had a study session! *'Ruby': My mom doesn't want me in the house anyway, so I just went with them. *'Bo'ok: She had no choice. *'Bubble': I had no yoylecakes. *'P'e'nci'l: So how'd ye felt about th' attack last night? *'Bo'ok: Attack? Oh! I think you're using it incorrectly, you really mean— *'Ruby': Bigger problems, Book. *'Bubble': I had a popping spoism!Bubble's popping spasms are rare. *'Bo'ok: My pages felt older. *'Ruby': I lost my shininess by 2%! *'P'e'nci'l: I felt a tinglin' in my eraser. *'Ruby': Oh! So … where's Match and the rest? *'P'e'nci'l: Match got weekend detention. *'Bo'ok: Ooh … according to my research of our school, nobody has been in weekend detention since 92 years, 2 months and 19 days ago!Apparently that date is September 21, 1915. *'Ruby': Really? *'Bubble': What aboit Blocky and the rest? *'Bo'ok: I said been in a weekend detention.Not "issued" a weekend detention! *'P'e'nci'l: You says "been" funny, Book. *'Bo'ok: Love you too, Pencil. *'Bubble': Woit, Match isn't with us? *'Bo'ok: No, the school forbids that students leave school even for medical reasons during detentions! '4. The front of the line' Scene: Estigua is now second in line, behind Mr. Czecherson, the mean teacher from detention. *'Czecherson': Thank you, sir, I need some for my children. They are all with my wife. *'Estigua': [quietly] Aquela coisa mal tem uma esposa e filhos?"That mean thing has a wife and kids?" (Pt.) *'Test Tube': Bye! And I'm a ma'am! Next! *'Estigua': Preciso de creme coceira! E fazer que quatro."I need itch cream! And make that four." (Pt.) *'Test Tube': [not looking] One itch cream coming right u— [looking up to her] Senhora T? É você?"Mrs. T? Is that you?" *'Estigua': Estou mais surpreso de ver você aqui."I'm more surprised to see you here." (Pt.) *'Test Tube': Yeah … *'Estigua': ''Por que estás aqui?"Why are you here?" (Pt.) *'Test Tube': I retired! *'Estigua': …E lo renomeaste à Farmácia de TT."And then you renamed it to 'TT's Pharmacy.'" (Pt.) *'Test Tube': Sim! '5. The alliance's position in the line' *'Ruby': OmgOh my gem., yes! *'Estigua': Penél'ta, temo-lo!"Penc, we have it!" (Pt.) *'P'e'nci'l: I think me mum be callin' me. *'Bubble': Boyo! *'P'e'nci'l: Kwaheri!"Goodbye!" (Sw.) *'Ruby': See you at school! *'Bubble': Noyo! *'P'e'nci'l: Wait, there ain't school today? *'Bo'ok: The clubs and colleges fair is in school today! [Exeunt Estigua out of the door with Needle and Nelson.] *'Ruby': See you at the fair! *'Estigua': Sair da porta!"We're exiting from the door!" (Pt.) *'P'e'nci'l: Comin' mum! [Exit Pencil.] '6. In the car' Scene: Estigua is driving the kids to school. *'P'e'nci'l: Wait, why're'ee drivin' to school? *'Estigua': La feira!"The fair!" (Pt.) *'P'e'nci'l: Oh! Am I th' only one who never realised'e? *'Estigua/Needle & Nelson': Sim!/Yes! *'P'e'nci'l: Omg, I feel so left out. '7. Outside Mrs. T's room' Scene: Mrs. Tannenbaum's room finally gets light. Match is still in weekend detention. *'Ma'tch: So dark. Yet so light. [Enter Mrs. Tannenbaum with Sparky.] *'Mrs. Tannenbaum': Oh there you are! The weekend's been over! *'Ma'tch: Yaaaaaaaaaay. [slowly walks out. As she leaves the room, a crowd has formed, spreading throughout the school.] Omg! [She sees the alliance talking to each other.] *'Ma'tch: Omg, there's everyone! [pushes through the crowd] Sorry … exceeeyoooooose me … thanks. *'P'e'nci'l: Match, you're free! *'Ruby': And you look like you're a mess! *'Ma'tch: I've been there for, like, two days and haven't gotten any food or light or sleep or anything! *'Bo'ok: Well– *'Ma'tch: Do you know how much time I've, like, wasted in there? I don't think anyone's got a weekend detention since, like, 92 years, like, 2 months and 19 days ago. *'Bo'ok: Correct! *'P'e'nci'l: Wot should we give 'er? *'Ruby': Morals. *'Bubble': Good one, Ruby! *'Ma'tch: Omg, let's, like, check out the clubs! *'Bo'ok: Yeah! *'P'e'nci'l: I feel like we're missin' some'n. *'Bo'ok: Yup … *'Ma'tch: Whoever it is, like, it doesn't matter. *'P'e'nci'l: OMG! We're missin' Pen! *'Ma'tch: I was right; he doesn't matter. *'Bo'ok: Match! *'Ma'tch: I mean … *'P'e'nci'l: We have ter run around the school 'til we find'e! *'Bubble': Hoyw can you find him if there's a croyd? *'P'e'nci'l: I GPS'd 'is cap. [The alliance looks at her like she's crazy.][The alliance looks at her like she's crazy.] *'Ma'tch: No wonder I hear him complain! *'P'e'nci'l: [trying to find] Ah! I can't find me GPS! *'Bo'ok: Oops, I accidentally stole yours from the party. Yeah, I'm a rebel! *'P'e'nci'l: Like … thank you, Book, you're a lifesaver! *'Li'fe Sa've'r: Actually, that's my job! [Everyone is confused.] *'P'e'nci'l: 'E's at the club stands. *'Ma'tch: Club stands? Then why are you so, like, excited? *'P'e'nci'l: So I can sign up wit' the same clubs as 'e! *'Ma'tch: I want to go so I can find boys there! *'Alliance': WOW. *'Bubble': Clubs? What about colleges? *'Ruby': Or universities? *'P'e'nci'l: Umm … why do all o' ye seem to know 'bout wot there are 'ere? *'Bubble': Uh … we can't soy. *'P'e'nci'l: Weird. But won't'ee be weird if we sign'd up fer the same clubs? *'Ruby': Well what if it's something you don't really like? *'P'e'nci'l: Don' be silly, Ruby, there ain't nothin'OMG, double negatives! me boy loves that I don't. *'Ruby': How about sports? *'P'e'nci'l: I love sports! *'Ruby': It could be— *'P'e'nci'l: Wot else? *'Ma'tch: How about the taste of olive oil? *'P'e'nci'l: Omg, Match! I can totally, like, eat Pen's traditional Grecian food like the terrible wonderful olive oil! [The rest of the alliance laugh.] *'Bubble': What aboit other goyrls? *'P'e'nci'l: Other girls? [sees the club stands] I doubt Pen'd sign up with— [sees him signing up for a club''This one has a girl looking all flirty to Pen.] 'OTHER GIRLS!!' '8. The club stands' '''Scene': Pen is signing up for football when the girl at the other club looks flirty to him. *'Sci'ssor: Yih, all our football positions were left by Trophy … but then he poimanentlyThis isn't Bubble's accent. It's actually the accent that old people from New York have. left. *'P'en: You mean dropped out— *'Sci'ssor: DON'T SAY THAT!!! *'P'en: Sorry! *'Sci'ssor: Look, kid. You wanna try out? I see you runnin' all the time. *'P'en: Wow, football's the same time as track? *'Sci'ssor: No, I also coach goils' softball. *'P'en: That explains the squealing. *'Sci'ssor: Mm. Now, if you wanna do it, you'll need training. Hard training.I don't know what football coaches say at clubs, I don't know what football coaches say at all, and I don't even know my school football coach! Then again, you'll be playin' fo the best team in the country! *'P'en: All because of Trophy? *'Sci'ssor: All 'cause of Trophy. [signs up] Y'know, while he was here he had several wives! *'P'en: Wives? *'Sci'ssor: Yep. Not girlfriends, wives.I just realised that "trophy wife" is so fitting to this! The big man vif kampas."Husband on campus." (Yiddish) *'P'en: Why? *'Sci'ssor: Let's just say he attracted many goils. Like 37% of the school. *'P'en: Goils? *'Sci'ssor: Goils! You know, G-I-R-L-S. *'P'en: Oh, that! That's gi— *'Sci'ssor: NO! But is that what you want? *'P'en: Well, I kind of … definitely … do have a goil girlfriend. [The girl at the next stand, Lola, breaves heavily in rage.] *'Lola': Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' *'Sci'ssor: Goil. Ya scared? This guy's gonna be on the football team! *'P'en: Well, a- actually, I was debating on— *'Lola': You have a girlfriend!? *'P'en: Yeah! *'Sci'ssor: This conversation boysBores, not bers. me. *'Lola': Y- YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!? *'P'en: Yeah, why? *'Lola': I don't know! [Enter Pencil and her alliance.] *'P'e'nci'l: Pen, get yer cap 'ere right now an' explain why you're talkin' to thet girl! *'Sci'ssor: Ooooooooooh, this just got nas-''ty!Sorry, all this time I wanted to write a high school "drama" involving some sort of object show. [''awkward silence] Go ahead. *'P'e'nci'l: [to Lola] Who's she? *'Lola': What's that? *'P'en: She's my girlfriend. [Meanwhile with the rest of the alliance.] *'Ma'tch: Omg! Let's go check out, like, the a-na-gram club. There's a really cute guy, like, there! Wanna come? *'Bo'ok: [gasps] I see gurus!If you rearrange the letters, it says "Sure, I guess?". *'1st 'Guru: Come all, come none, to the Indian Cultures Club! *'2nd Guru': Where you don't have to learn about the Indian culture! *'Needle': You don't have to learn? Oh goodie! *'2nd Guru': No, you do have to learn; it's Indian Cultures Club for a reason. *'1st 'Guru: मैं आप ज़ोर से या शांत करना चाहिए?"Should I make you louder or quieter?" (Hindi) *'Bo'ok: Wow, so interesting! I'm going. [Exit Book.] *'Ma'tch: Wait! [wanders her eyes to the fashion club] Like, what about the IPFT club? Can you see the leader? Ooh la la … *'Bo'ok: I "pft" you!Think of the sounds they make in Rock Bottom. *'Ruby': Match, what does IPFT mean? *'Ma'tch: Only, like, the Inter-Planetary Fashion Trends Club! *'Bubble': I don't soy how fashion trends from oyther planets pertoin to the conversoition! *'Ma'tch: Don't, like, worry Bubble, we'll find something for you. [Exeunt Match, Ruby and Bubble.] *'P'e'nci'l: Like, totally. [to Pen] Okay, let's go, this girl's creepin' me out. [Exeunt Pen and Pencil. The alliance follows them.] '9. A corner' Scene: A corner darker than the rest of the school. Pencil and Pen stay there from hiding from Lola. *'P'e'nci'l: Omg, who is she? *'P'en: I don't know. But she freaked out when she saw you. *'P'e'nci'l: I h'ain't thet intimidating ain't'I? *'P'en: No … *'Bo'ok: Hey. *'P'e'nci'l: 'Ey. *'Ma'tch: We, like, signed ourselves up for every club in school. *'Bo'ok: We raced to see who could be the fastest! *'Ruby': I won! *'Bubble': She is so foist! *'Bo'ok: Alright. So we signed all of us up for the A students club (except for Match), Alphabeting Club, Arabic Club, Attic Greek Culture Club, Anagram Club, Ambigram Club, and when I went to the university section by myself I was interested in the University of Arugula, the University of … [Meanwhile, at the club stands.] *'Lola': I'm gonna get you, Pencil Triángolo! [kicks over the club stand] Aaaaaaaaaaah! *'Nearby students': Aaaaaaaaaaaaah! *'Lola': This arts and crafts club is over! *'Conch': Does that mean we signed up for nothing? *'Lola': YES! I only came here because I knew Pen would like football, but instead he blew me off! *'Conch': Isn't that a go— *'Lola': NO! Now, out of my way! I need to go! [Exit Lola after them. Meanwhile, with the alliance.] *'Bo'ok: … and the Zzyzx Roadrunners' Club. I didn't get a chance to see the r— *'P'e'nci'l: Omg, I see thet thing! [sees Lola knock down other people to get Pencil] *'Lola': Pencil Triángolo, I'm comin' to get you! *'P'e'nci'l: She knows me las' name! [They back away slowly.] *'Lola': Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' *'Bubble': Not this again! [They back away quickly.] *'Conch': [quickly] Lola! Come here! *'Lola': Gqaaaaah, what now! *'Conch': Quickly! The real Arts and Crafts club leader would like a word with you! [The alliance sees a giant screen TV.''The TV plays the favourite show of anyone who is watching it.] *'P'e''''''nci'l': Omg, thet TV's playin' me favourite show! *'Ruby': You like ''Gems Daily? *'P'e'nci'l: No! *'Bubble': That's interesting! I'm woitching Yoylebaking! *'Ma'tch: I, like, see a new fashion series! *'P'en: Tales of the Ambassador for me. *'Bo'ok: History of Kenya: Director's Cut. *'P'e'nci'l: I'm watchin' Tuesday Afternoon Football''An American football show. *'P'en': In that case, so am I! *'P'e'nci'l': Really? 'kay. Who's winnin' right now. *'P'en': The team with the … uh … thing. *'Lola': Hh-''nn! Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' Hh-''nn!'' *'''Bo'ok': That growling sounds familiar. *'Ruby': It's Lola! Quick! Hop into the TV! *'Ma'tch': Omg, don't be ridic', nobody can hop into the— [''hops to the TV at the same time as Ruby] *'Bubble': Boyo! [goes in] *'''Bo'ok': Yeah … see ya! [''goes in] *'Lola': [teleports nearer to Pen and Pencil as Evil Leafy would do] Omg! It's finally … you! … I know … everything about … you. Your … favourite colour … is cerulean … you have … sang at … the K for a year … as of now, lived … in Canada— *'P'e'nci'l: Okay, let's go in! [She jumps in. Then arms come out of the TV and drag him in. Lola follows, but hits her head on the screen.] *'Lola': Why!? *'Everyone': Hahahahaahahahahahahahahahah! Notes